Blog07-5May

~ MAY 1st-15th, 2007 ~

(the latest entries are always added to the top)

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law. - AL I:40

Tuesday May 15th 2007 - 3:35pm I received a question from a student asking, “I am trying to set up my altar according to The Book of The Law Chapter III. What is your opinion on verse 23?” ... Answer: the verse in question reads, “For perfume mix meal & honey & thick leavings of red wine: then oil of Abramelin and olive oil, and afterward soften & smooth down with rich fresh blood.” ... I try to avoid giving too much personal advice on Liber AL especially when it comes to the Third Chapter. I would simply say, research & do what thou wilt. However, you might consider what Aleister Crowley originally wrote: “This incense was made; and the prediction most marvellously fulfilled.” Later explaining; “Meal: ordinary wheaten flour; leavings: the ‘besswing’ of port should be good; Oil of Abramelin: take eight parts of oil of cinnamon, four of oil of myrrh, two of oil of galangal, seven of olive oil.” Also, while at Cefalu, Crowley devised a certain ritual known as The Ceremony of preparing the Cakes of Light. It appears in a diary entry dated June 1921. To assist him with the ritual was Alostrael or Leah Hirsig, Mary Butts and Cecil Maitland. He writes, “A young cock is to be baptized Peter Paul into the Catholic Church by C.J.A.Maitland, the son of an apostate Romish Priest, & therefore the ideal ‘Black’ Hierophant. Mary & I are its sponsors. Peter Paul as the founders of the Christian Church, & we want its blood to found our own Church. Alostrael then dances against the will of Mary, on my swearing to give her to the half of my kingdom. She demands P.P.’s head on the Disk. I behead him, & the blood is caught in the silver ‘charger’ on the Disk. In this charger is the meal & c. for the Cakes of Light, ready except for the blood. I conjure the spirit of P.P. to serve these Cakes to found our Church with, as we may use them. The cock is slain in honour of Ra Hoor Khuit who is invoked before the killing.” ... ... Amusing, yes, but I don’t think the OTO advocates this ritual for its Gnostic Church. Its too Thelemic!

11:40am It just came across the NEWS; famed televangelist Rev. Jerry Falwell, who founded the Moral Majority, died this morning at the tender age of 73. We should all light a candle for him so hopefully he can find his way out of Hell or better yet, maybe he should stay there and be attacked over and over by thousands of Tinky Winkies with purses.

9:40am Recently, I received a few great questions. One asked, “How does one correlate one’s progress within a mundane Order such as the OTO with one’s A.’.A.’. progress? Would the two Orders simply reside on different planes?” ... Answer: The OTO is called a ‘horizontal’ fraternity. It functions primarily on this plane in the mundane and its responsibility, in theory, is to produce good little Thelemites who can lead humanity forward by example. Of course, it fails miserably at this task because it neither advises nor teaches The Book of the Law. In fact, studying the book and talking about it is considered forbidden. The OTO adheres strongly to the principles laid down in The Tunis Comment. The AA, on the other hand, teaches individual spirituality and although the early stages prepare an initiate to function horizontally, it does this in order to create a proper foundation for its students to move ‘vertically’ or within and off this plane. The one thing you must always remember, the OTO works on the macrocosmic Tree of Life or on Earth only, the AA works on the internal microcosmic Tree but still, even in a microcosmic universe, your Malkuth is part of your body! This implies, no matter how far you sail within your soul the waters will always wash upon the shores of your reality. Thus AA will always have a ‘horizontal’ connection. The question is, “How much of a mundane foundation should there be?” In every case, less is best. I always like to think that the distinction between OTO and AA can be summed up by the Biblical quote – “Render unto Caesar the things which are Caesar’s, and unto God the things that are God’s” (Matthew 22:21)

6:20am I received an interesting comment by my student after reading Monday's blog [May 14th 2007, 7:00am] He writes, “The pyrimidos is intriguing and perplexing. I enjoy discovering the layers of the rituals and writings that light up whenever I'm able to make another connection in any other part of the work. It's like a dimensional network of memes. The occult path at this level sometimes seems like a series of puzzles that when as they're solved, bit by bit revealing a panorama - a map - hopefully of something more real than what came before it. As far as Invoking the Lilith - well, since what is primordial is also inevitable, I suppose it's a better plan to just go ahead and invoke in full consciousness rather than looking the other way, and hoping for the best while she slithers around on her own terms. ... but then again, there's the whole "extreme sports" angle to consider...” ... Comment: Always remember that the 'occult path' that you mentioned leads to Chapel Perilous which is the mythical home of the Holy Grail, sought by the knights of 14th century Arturian romance. Have you ever read Herman Hesse’s Steppenwolf? Everyone who walks upon the path inevitably finds a building, like Steppenwolf, with a sign saying “Magic Theater Entrance. Not for Everybody, For Madmen only!” The only price of admission is your sanity and consider what Robert Anton Wilson wrote about Chapel Perilous in The Cosmic Trigger: “When you think you’re out of it, you’re just in another hall of illusions painted to look like the safe forest outside; and when you think you’re inside again, you’ll suddenly discover you’re actually walking on the road back home.” Ah, yes, true magick is layered like an onion that must be slowly peeled without burning your eyes out of your socket! As for Lilith, or your Kundry; better to be the one in ‘control’ of her rather than her being in control of you! Malkuth is her world. Let her loose on her own and she will blind-side you at every turn because she controls the four-fold elements. In the Abramelin workings we are clearly informed that it is the demons who created Earth under God's control but, if they're unleashed, they love distracting you to Kligsor's Castle which lays at the base of the sacred mountain. Parsifal was the only knight who could resist the demon Kundry's temptations and, in a twisted sense, he becomes her savior from the curse of forever taking on 'new shapes' in order to bring men to the point of suffering through seduction. It is extrememly important to always remember, we cannot hate the Kundry. Remember this written about her curse in Wagner : "After each new and, in the end, profoundly hateful victory, after each new fall by man, she flies into a rage; she then flees into the wilderness, where by the most severe atonements and chastisements she is, for a while, able to escape from the power of the curse upon her; yet it is denied to her to find salvation by this route. Within her, again and again, arises a desire to be redeemed by a man, this being the only way of redemption offered by the curse: thus does innermost necessity cause her repeatedly to fall victim anew to the power through which she is reborn as a seductress. The penitent then falls into a deathly sleep: it is the seductress who wakes, and who, after her mad frenzy, becomes a penitent again." ... Parsifal must have been good at extreme sports, no?

5:10amam A friend sent me an email this morning asking if I believed in Soulmates. I smiled and replied, "I once had this romantic notion that there was a perfect woman out there for me but this idea has faded over time. I’ve become more cynical. Maybe that is why I'm still single. Maybe its the realization of how can I find a perfect match to my soul if I no longer own it?"

Monday May 14th 2007 - 7:00am I received some interesting questions from one of our students in regards to Liber Pyramidos. He wrote, “Some first thoughts about the pyrimidos ritual: Ok. Now about this “dangerous word” in the pyrimidos. That’s some serious shit! Why would a neophyte be implanted with a key to a lower astral hell-gate and told not to repeat it backward? Subconsciously the mind would/does reverse it instantly on hearing the suggestion, no? Is this anything like accepting a close and personal relationship with one’s Pandora’s Box? I’ve been exposed to the impact of things on their own plane before, and wouldn’t make light of the possibilities here. I take it the pyrimidos ritual occurs on a number of planes at once – some of them non- or supra-personal??? If this is the foundation of the pyramid, what kind of device are we ultimately building? Is it possible for the Neophyte to know? Can the word be acknowledged but refused for one’s preference? Is this just ritual rhetoric meant to scare the new guy? Get me a beer!” .... Answer: Yes, this is a Pandora’s box! Liber Pyramidos is an ‘initiation’ ritual starting the unfoldment process on the entire Tree, and on multiple levels, in each individual. Note the comment in The Vision & The Voice 14th Aethyr. “Verily is the Pyramid a Temple of Initiation.” ... As for “Sazaz etc”, according to ancient Qabalists when this phrase was uttered backwards by Adam it opened the Gates of Hell and low and behold he inevitably got his Lilith! ... As magicians we use the phrase [primarily] twice in the AA; first on Malkuth and then upon reaching the Abyss. However, the important question to ask is why do we open the Abyss while we are in Malkuth and, if we are in Malkuth, does opening the Abyss have any real affect on us? Critics are out on why we do this and it seems everyone and every lineage has a different opinion and I’ve heard a diverse amount; many quite fascinating. ... Let me quote part of the ritual: “Asar Un-nefer! I invoke. The Fourfold Horror of the Smoke. Unloose the Pit! by the dread Word, Of Power -that Set-Typhon hath heard - SAZAZ SAZAZ ANDATSAN SAZAZ.” ... We begin by saying Asar Un-nefer! or “Myself made perfect”, thee I invoke. The fourfold nature represents Malkuthian phantoms spawned by our lower Demon et Kundry (symbolically similar to that on a higher level with Choronzon in the Abyss). Although it has been suggested by some that this verse is evoking and opening the ‘greater’ Abyss, it is in fact an affirmation to evoke our lower demon so that we can ‘control’ it on Malkuth. Similar to how we must ‘control’ Choronzon at the edge of the Abyss. In Crowley’s De Nuptiis Secretis, Deorum cum Hominibus it states: "to every Neophyte of the Order of AA appeareth a demon in the form of a woman to pervert him; within Our own knowledge have not less than nine brethren been utterly cast out thereby." And also consider what he wrote in Confessions: "I believe then, and believe now ... the neophyte is nearly always tempted by a woman." [pg. 659.] Ah, why do you think the Kundry is, as one’s manifested demon, attracted to the Neophyte, or dare we say, why did the Neophyte evoke her? ... Unfortunately I cannot go more into this ritual until you are ready to actually do it. And yes, the ritual should scare you. It is one thing talking about attracting a Kundry but it’s another thing to realize you've deliberately evoked her by doing Liber Pyramidos in order to put her under control. ... Finally, yes, beer helps!

Sunday May 13th, 2007 - 7:25am A friend sent me an interesting email on Thursday and I’m finally getting down the pile of incoming mail to answering it. He commented on my blog of May 3rd regarding Liber AL vel Legis I:44 as the ‘Banishing Ritual.’ What he wrote, I’d like to share with my readers : “I have employed this verse over the last week. Then, last night, based on your entry about developing a personal understanding of rituals, I contemplated the meaning or purpose of the signs of silence and of Horus used in the LBRP, inadvertently bringing the two issues together. I wondered if I was anywhere near getting the point of the LBRP that led Crowley to call the ritual the ‘Stone of the Wise’. From my journal, with one embedded question: Sign of Horus: The power of Kether and all the power of the universe rushes through me. I direct this power with my will. I employ my full and focused will to control all of the power of the cosmos. I must be totally focused and confident to command the cosmos. I am the active half of HRH. Nothing can withstand my force. I am a god of War. Sign of Silence/Godform of HPK: My will is now perfect in its silence. I am Hermetically sealed. My will is singular and receives no external impulse. I am the passive (?) half of HRH. I can withstand any force. I am a god of Peace (?). ... Horus/HPK: Perhaps these two signs, one after another, are the macrocosm and microcosm in balance, if not in union. Both represent perfect Will, but one commanding the macrocosm and one the microcosm. [Question: If so, then why is Horus, who I identify here with the macrocosm, drawing the pentagrams, symbols of the microcosm? A way of balancing opposing forces? Or is it simpler? The pentagrams just deal with the elements in the outer world - the macrocosm.] -- For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of results, is every way perfect. The Perfect (Will in the macrocosm) and the Perfect (Will in the microcosm) are one Perfect and not two; nay, are none! (I:44-45). I must replicate the power of these signs/godforms in my life and self. Also, HRH is in Tiphareth, where the microcosm and macrocosm unite (or is it that they become indistinguishable?). When one's Will is perfect in the microcosm and the macrocosm, those two Wills become indistinguishable--are one; nay are none! One has then reconstructed the macrocosm in accordance with one's Will.” ...... Answer: If you’ve studied Jung and symbols then this is a classic example of archetype unfolding. What is difficult is that most magicians rarely give enough data as to ‘why’ such symbols might have appeared. Although a ritual might have ‘triggered’ or stirred your unconscious waters, what surfaced symbolically could have been seeds planted long ago. It is one of the major reasons why we keep diaries. What I tell my own students is that it’s virtually impossible to ‘interpret’ magickal dreams of another magician without knowledge of the road [i.e. life] that lead them to the dream and usually, the only person who can do it properly, is the magician himself. At some point in your career “pieces of the puzzle come together.” If you’ve been keeping diaries and writing your autobiography, which are like road maps, then this, and other, ‘seemingly’ random thoughts begin to make sense. Such euphoric moments are then called eureka. My advice, as it is to all my students, is avoid letting others interpret your magickal dreams simply because, without the knowledge of your life as a reference point, someone else could do more damage than good by misleading you. Just write everything down and realize that no two Stars are alike. Astrologically your Universe [internally wherein lies your Star] is different than mine. Its Laws are different. Its symbols are different. What Horus draws or does in your dreams to advise or teach may not be the same in mine. The bottom line is that the deeper you go into Self, the more that unfolds and it would be presumptuous of me to advice you on the course that you’ve set. If I interpreted your magickal dreams wouldn’t I be implying that I know your True Will? Remember what Crowley wrote about the diary in Magick Without Tears, “Without this you are in the position of a navigator with neither chart nor log.”

Saturday May 12, 2007 - 2:00am A very dear friend of mine sent a great email with questions about the Kundry. After reading her email, I replied, “The Kundry is a tough subject to understand. Many of the questions that you asked are difficult ones because they require that I know all the circumstances as to why you are asking them and, as such, they tend to require more ‘personal answers.’ Being such, each case would be different. But basically the best way to escape the process of attractive a Kundrie is to learn the signs as to how your temptations trap you and then consciously take control of them. Granted, it sounds far simpler than it really is. We must also learn never to confuse the planes. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar and sometime attraction is just that; or having the desire for another. Is there anything wrong with this? Not really. But for the magician who is attempting to take control of their reality it can become devastating. As for most of humanity, it is no better than animals who unconsciously seek food, shelter and sex etc & etc. On that note; for me to give ‘standard’ circumstances when a person should avoid being attracted to or by, or even having sex with others whom ‘might’ be Kundries, would be absolutely wrong. It would imply that I know a person’s True Will or the reason behind the experience that they’ve chosen in their incarnation. So to give you cut & dry answers may inevitably mislead you. ... One great question that you did ask: “Why is the female usually exempt from the occurrence of the Kundry? What are those rare conditions in which she is as vulnerable as a male aspirant? In other words, can a Kundry be male?” ... Answer: Men have more difficulty understanding this than woman. I think it has to do with the male ego thinking itself perfect that it detests the idea of outside interference bringing them down. Anyway, the answer is quite simple. Men are Hadit the infinitesimal point, while women are the circle, the infinity of Nuit. In a Tantric sense, on this plane, man is the ‘positive’ while women are the ‘negative’ but this polarity reverses on the next plane. Ah, the roots of Tantric sex based in polarity. When either sex falters 'on this plane' the rule of thumb is simple: men attract that which lies within, women repel that which lies within. In other words, men draw toward themselves a ‘manifested’ version of the internal which will attempt to keep them on Malkuth and out of the branches of the Tree of Life. Granted; this is usually a ‘woman’ who is the Kundrie, as in the Graal legend but in truth it can be ‘anything’ which tempts the man to falter from the Path because the Kundrie rules Earth and controls the four-fold elements. She knows what, where and how to tempt the man and men, being foul shallow little creature that we are, a naked woman with cute breasts will do just fine. ... On the other hand, since the woman seeks the internal ‘infinitesimal point’ of their Hadit and when achieved, all power of the Universe flows through them (AL I:15), if they falter or fall they do not ‘attract’ a Kundrie. They actually do the opposite; they ‘become’ the Kundrie or their own worst enemy. (AL III:43) At that point they internally begin to shut down and ‘repel’ energy. On this plane it either means pushing men away in a relationship or, in rare cases, they can draw ‘other’ men toward themselves because; isn’t this the nature of a Kundrie? ... The bottom line is that the male process, rooted on this plane, is far more shallow and almost an uncomplicated little ‘point’ while the woman’s process is not; it being rooted in the infinity of the ‘circle.’ ... Another great question, “Is there a Kundry to tempt the aspirant at each level of growth? If so, is there conversely, also a person who appears to the aspirant who is helpful? I'm thinking of the role of Beatrice in Dante's work....” ... Yes, read what I wrote on in my blog on Tuesday May 1st 2007 at 8:20am about the circle and the square of magickal degrees; or “no matter which magickal degree you hold, “You must master and learn to control the forces of the Square” while placing your “Spirit within the care of the Circle.” On that note; a person in Tiphereth who has not learned to control the 'square' will attract a different kind of negative energy than when they resided in Netzach. Then again, considering the nature of the circle also changes with each stage of magickal growth; a person in Tiphereth will attract a different kind of positive energy than when they resided in Netzach. ... Finally, there is no station on one's path in which the aspirant is free from temptations. I can only advise that basically you ‘know’ when you are being ‘tempted’ in a negative sense because you get unconscious whispers (from the daimon) telling you “No.” ... but then again, don’t confuse all temptations as being wrong. The world is your playground; the ‘nature’ of polarity; attracting and repelling is hard to escape since ‘sexual currents’ are everywhere and in every thing. Again; sometime a cigar is just a cigar.

6:00am Today is officially recognized on the books as ‘Limerick day’ which is supposedly the one day every year where people try to appreciate this form of verse. On that note, I’d like to share with you one of my favorite written by the Beast :

My name it is Aleister Crowley

I’m a master of M ----------- unholy

Of philes & pentacles,

Covens, conventicles,

Of basil, nepenthe, & moly.

Friday May 11, 2007 – 11:05am I received a good question yesterday about The Star Ruby but, with regret, I had to reply: “This is not my favorite ritual and, admittedly, I haven’t even looked at it over 25 years so I’m a bit rusty on theory with this one and most of my notes are packed away. I started to shift away from it simply because of utter confusion. Crowley wrote this ritual and therefore, he and he alone knows the attributes and meaning. However, he utterly changes the attributes and signs to the ritual in his books, notes and letters; especially those of NOX. Trying to make sense of all the contradictions was simply too much for me so I gave up.” I then added that my previous blogs, where I mentioned why the ‘circle and square’ numbers reversing above Tiphereth, and “What I didn’t mention was that I tend to go with Crowley’s attributes of NOX as N 6=5 (Geburah), O 7=4 (Chesed) and X as the Babe in the Abyss; all under the Night of PAN. IO PAN! There is a reason why The Star Ruby is Liber 25; it being one of the numbers of the magickal square of Mars, the starting point of NOX moving toward the Abyss.” ... Ah, more food for thought!

7:00am As an adendum to my last post. If ‘in Tiphereth is Geburah accomplished and in Netzach is Chesed fulfilled.’ What sphere lies between Tiphereth & Netzach? Is it not DEATH, or better still, NUN; the 'N' in the formula of ON which is the 'female' half of the equation. Maybe there is a reason why the daimon, rooted in prana, can go no higher than Tiphereth? Especialy considering its masculine roots within the 'O' of the formula of ON. Can everyone say BABALON and crossing the Abyss into Binah the Eternal Mother?

6:40am I received an interesting email wherein a person asked “I enjoyed your comments about the symbols of circle & square but after Tiphereth [Adeptus Minor 5=6] the numbers reverse in the next magickal degrees. Why?” ... Answer: I presume that you are referring to my entry of May 1st? As you noted; all the 'magickal degree symbols' from the spheres of Tiphereth, and below, have the ‘circle’ to the left with a smaller number while the square to the right is the higher number. This pattern doesn’t change with the number next to the square because they always relate to the Qabalistic square in which the magician resides and which he must learn to ‘control.’ These steadily ascend from Malkuth 10 to Kether 1. ... However, what you are referring to is the numbers next to the ‘circle’ .... these start in reverse on the Tree from Kether being 10 and descend to Malkuth being 1. ... which means that, below Tiphereth, you place your faith in a Higher authority upon the Tree. However, once you reach the grade of Adeptus Major 6=5 in the Qabalistic sphere of Geburah you are placing your trust downward into Tiphereth (6), or your own Star while attempting to control Geburah (5). ... And, when you enter Chesed, as an Adeptus Exemptus 7=4, they place their trust in Netzach (7) while controlling Chesed (4). ... Perplexed? ... In both cases, these magickal degrees are within the Higher Self and require the Lower Self, or the ‘personality’ as a vehicle. ... from Geburah on up everything works through that which you have already placed under your control. You must clearly understand this because it will become instrumental in a successful crossing of the Abyss. In many ways placing your Lower Self under control is the realization of the foundation of your incarnation, embracing the Higher Self is accomplishing your True Will as to why you have incarnated but the latter requires a perfect vehicle, and again, one which is under control. Furthermore, your daimon (HGA) which guided you upward into Tiphereth can go no higher than Tiphereth; it being the door from whence it came. Between Tiphereth and the Abyss you are on your own. You have all the knowledge that you need in order to prepare for the ordeal of crossing the Abyss but, if you trust in your daimon, who assisted you upward to the threshold, you must equally realize that he didn’t abandon you. You still have him with you but he resides ‘below’ Tiphereth. He can go no higher. Although confusing to some, the magician clearly understands at this point the Qabalistic axiom; ‘in Tiphereth is Geburah accomplished and in Netzach is Chesed fulfilled.’

Thursday May 10, 2007 – 5:40am An admitted "Minerval in the OTO" sent me an email asking this question: "If you're an AA website why are you so conceerned with OTO? You seem preoccupied with it." Answer: Good question but I'll ignore the rest of your comments because they reveal more "pettiness" from yourself than of me. Anyway, I was an upper degree member for years and am I suppose to forget everything now that I'm no longer a member? It's hard 'not' reflecting upon things learned, regardless where from. I also agree, this is an AA website but hopefully, since we are AA, we can learn from others. Maybe I missed that statement in AC's curriculum where he stated that we must reflect upon all religions and philosophies for Truth except the OTO. Have you not looked at the AA Student's Reading List lately? ... Where is a microwave when you need it?

Wednesday May 9, 2007 – 10:20am After days of final editing & proofing I have just release issue No.8 of CORNELIA. In this issue I continue on with Part Seven of IN QUEST OF THE HOLY GUARDIAN ANGEL titled The First Two Moons, The man of Earth & the Material Stage. This will be the first in the series where daily practices are beginning to be laid out. We also include in this issue the next section to THE MAGICKAL ESSENCE OF ALEISTER CROWLEY titled An Open Letter regarding the Holy Guardian Angel.’ And, our 'crowd-pleaser' continues with Chapter Four of MEMOIRS OF AN OTO INITIATE. This chapter leads up to the final days before the actual 'Police Raid' against the OTO in Berkeley, California in 1989. Finally, we continue on with our biographies; this time it being that of Christopher Isherwood and his connection with Aleister Crowley. I am also re-releasing, by popular request, a lecture given by Grady McMurtry on Liber Atlantis, the Gnostic Mass and other goodies titled AN OPEN EPISTLE ON THE MYSTERIES OF OTO.

9:45am Here is a question I received awhile ago from a woman in Southern California but I think the reply is something another recent inquiry might learn from. Question: “I have been reading a lot about Crowley’s life lately and it seems to me he was very abusive toward woman. I also only just bought a copy of Francis King’s Secret Rituals of the OTO on-line. I don’t see it mentioning anything of worth for me or even of women’s mysteries in general. You’ve written about the ‘N’ part of the formula of ON being feminine but how does this relate to the OTO’s teachings?” ... Answer: It is no secret that Crowley was sadistic and often cruel and vicious toward women. He treated most like dirt and it doesn’t take a brain surgeon to realize that what he writes in some of his more spiritual or magickal works totally contradicts his behavior. This is one of the reasons why the OTO today is trying to shift itself away from the image of the Great Beast. The more literature which becomes available about this man’s life the more he becomes offensive toward women. As far as the Ordo Templi Orientis goes; if anyone thinks that women have a place within this Order they are obviously deluded and I’d like to sell them a bridge. Woman’s magick is NOT mentioned anywhere in Crowley’s Upper Degree Papers whose teaching are predominantly phallic and of a male current nature. Can anyone prove me wrong? Any and all female references in OTO papers refer to woman simply as the ‘vehicle’ for men. In the past it was argued that women in the OTO either need to get with the program or get out. Of course modern women in the OTO are trying to rectify this dilemma by now incorporating their own Mysteries and holding seminars with ‘new’ teachings. ... The problem has become twofold. First, all the OTO’s early initiations rituals are phallic lessons designed to unconsciously prepare the candidate to understand its over-all Greater Mysteries. What do you think the tent represents? The ‘utterence’ of the Word? In other words, these initiation rituals prepare both men and women for phallic mysteries. Women who are now trying to incorporate novel or improved 'feminine teachings' into the Order fail to ask themselves two important questions. First, “What do my teachings have to do in regards to OTO’s phallic initiation rituals?” And second, “Am I to consider OTO initiations useless to modern women and out-dated?” ... One woman who advocates these modern ‘woman seminars’ in OTO once told me, “If men have their Mysteries why can’t we have ours?” She was shocked when I replied, “But I agreed!” However, she wasn’t prepared when I then fired back, “But why did you join a phallic Mystery Order?” ... Still, and more important, do these women holding the seminars understand the magickal Formula of the Minerval or ON which is portrayed in all rituals up to the Seventh? And, if so, are they trying to explore and understand how the ‘N’ in the formula works? Obviously it is here where Crowley failed the woman and although he understood the ‘O’ in the formula ON or the mechanics of the male phallic current and the nature of semen as a ‘Holy Word’, he simply looked at women as a vehicle for his ‘blessing’ and for the reception of the utterance of his gift. At no time does he attempt to teach, or even understand how 156 or ‘N’ works on the Tree of Life for the women or how ‘All Power’ comes through her. He simply believed that women are stupid insipid little creatures and should be kept in the dark; otherwise they will contaminate the manifestation of his ‘Word.’ In some ways it is a hard argument. ... Anyway, can modern OTO rectify these problems? I wish it could but I’m not holding my breath. The first rule of thumb for growth or furtherance of knowledge, even within the most mundane of scientific schools, is honesty in its experiments. The OTO is neither scientific nor honest about its own teachings. I was an initiate in the upper degrees of the OTO for almost twenty-seven years, I watched it reduce the teachings of the Gnostic Mass to a ‘religious experience’ while avoiding the true phallic mysteries so as not to “offend the females”, as Frater Sabazius once told me in an email.

5:00am After reading my on on-line piece on Magical Diaries a young man sent me some questions : “Do you still keep diaries and how old were you when you started?” Answer: My very first diary is a small 5x6 handwritten spiral book/black cover which I began on January 28th 1966. I still have it. I was fourteen. And yes, I’m constantly reviewing my old diaries and emails and etc. Like yourself, I am often reading entries where I’m noticeably ‘wrong’ with what I’ve written and yes, I do fight the urge to destroy the evidence. I think the problem with reading Crowley, myself or anyone who writes volumes is that some people may tend to see ‘folly and contradictions’ but I know that none of us, yourself included, are born perfect. So my advice to you is do not destroy old diaries, they are important in helping you understand yourself and the turning points in your life which inevitably brought you to where you now stand. Why else would you keep them? ... Of note: my diaries from August 1995 to present are now on computer which enables me accurate page counts; from 1995 to present my diaries total 7,259 pages. Now this count doesn’t include all the Red Flames, Cornelias, Epistles, books, articles and emails etc & etc that I’ve written over the year. Yes, I pity my literary executor or anyone trying to make sense out of my life!

9:45am Here is a question I received awhile ago from a woman in Southern California but I think the reply is something another recent inquiry might learn from. Question: “I have been reading a lot about Crowley’s life lately and it seems to me he was very abusive toward woman. I also only just bought a copy of Francis King’s Secret Rituals of the OTO on-line. I don’t see it mentioning anything of worth for me or even of women’s mysteries in general. You’ve written about the ‘N’ part of the formula of ON being feminine but how does this relate to the OTO’s teachings?” ... Answer: It is no secret that Crowley was sadistic and often cruel and vicious toward women. He treated most like dirt and it doesn’t take a brain surgeon to realize that what he writes in some of his more spiritual or magickal works totally contradicts his behavior. This is one of the reasons why the OTO today is trying to shift itself away from the image of the Great Beast. The more literature which becomes available about this man’s life the more he becomes offensive toward women. As far as the Ordo Templi Orientis goes; if anyone thinks that women have a place within this Order they are obviously deluded and I’d like to sell them a bridge. Woman’s magick is NOT mentioned anywhere in Crowley’s Upper Degree Papers whose teaching are predominantly phallic and of a male current nature. Can anyone prove me wrong? Any and all female references in OTO papers refer to woman simply as the ‘vehicle’ for men. In the past it was argued that women in the OTO either need to get with the program or get out. Of course modern women in the OTO are trying to rectify this dilemma by now incorporating their own Mysteries and holding seminars with ‘new’ teachings. ... The problem has become two-fold. First, all the OTO’s early initiations rituals are phallic lessons designed to unconsciously prepare the candidate to understand its over-all Greater Mysteries. What do you think the tent represents? The ‘utterence’ of the Word? In other words, these initiation rituals prepare both men and women for phallic mysteries. Women who are now trying to incorporate novel or improved 'feminine teachings' into the Order fail to ask themselves two important questions. First, “What do my teachings have to do in regards to OTO’s phallic initiation rituals?” And second, “Am I to consider OTO initiations useless to modern women and out-dated?” ... One woman who advocates these modern ‘woman seminars’ in OTO once told me, “If men have their Mysteries why can’t we have ours?” She was shocked when I replied, “But I agreed!” However, she wasn’t prepared when I then fired back, “But why did you join a phallic Mystery Order?” ... Still, and more important, do these women holding the seminars understand the magickal Formula of the Minerval or ON which is portrayed in all rituals up to the Seventh? And, if so, are they trying to explore and understand how the ‘N’ in the formula works? Obviously it is here where Crowley failed the woman and although he understood the ‘O’ in the formula ON or the mechanics of the male phallic current and the nature of semen as a ‘Holy Word’, he simply looked at women as a vehicle for his ‘blessing’ and for the reception of the utterance of his gift. At no time does he attempt to teach, or even understand how 156 or ‘N’ works on the Tree of Life for the women or how ‘All Power’ comes through her. He simply believed that women are stupid insipid little creatures and should be kept in the dark; otherwise they will contaminate the manifestation of his ‘Word.’ In some ways it is a hard argument. ... Anyway, can modern OTO rectify these problems? I wish it could but I’m not holding my breath. The first rule of thumb for growth or furtherance of knowledge, even within the most mundane of scientific schools, is honesty in its experiments. The OTO is neither scientific nor honest about its own teachings. I was an initiate in the upper degrees of the OTO for almost twenty-seven years, I watched it reduce the teachings of the Gnostic Mass to a ‘religious experience’ while avoiding the true phallic mysteries so as not to “offend the females”, as Frater Sabazius once told me in an email.

Tuesday May 8th 2007 - 11:30am Frank 93! So you’re ready to face whatever comes down with a clear conscience; good but that is usually the sign of a bad memory, no?

11:25am Another person writes, “I think your 2012 blog is fear-mongering. I like to think the world will be around awhile and I want to embrace it and be part of it.” My comment: Big smile here! I tend to agree, the Age of Aquarius has just begun but that doesn’t mean there is not going to be an Armageddon to wash away the old! Anyway, I salute you. I love optimists but remember, if you think everything is coming your way, you might be in the wrong lane.

11:10am I am always amused by which of my blogs inspire the most instant replies. My last entry had one guy firing off: “Do you think a Democratic or Republican President will be the best for 2012?” Answer: It’ll all depend upon whether or not you want to have the fight here or abroad!

10:20am I received an odd question amidst an amusing email regarding my thoughts about the end of the world! Ah, I see a Jerry tome emerging! To answer such; let me rant yes, I’ve heard that the Mayan calendar, being unbelievably precise, does not go beyond December 21st 2012 because they believe the Earth will end on that date. For the historical record; throughout US history most Democratic Presidents have not been known for being militarily sharp when it comes to foreign policies. Their views to embrace everyone worldwide as they themselves want to be embraced only leads to our enemies thinking we are weak. It is a dangerous world out there and the next President, the 55th, will be elected in November of 2008, taking office in 2009. This means that the next President will be the one in charge when the proverbial ‘ends’ comes. I think we need a strong leader! It doesn’t take a brain surgeon to realize that we are heading toward a world catalyst that is being spawned by hatred from Islam against all infidels; especial Christian countries like the US. These conflicts will inevitable lead to Armageddon (Greek: αρμαγεδδων). In The Book of Revelations Chapter 16 it states: “And I saw three foul spirits like frogs coming from the mouth of the dragon, from the mouth of the beast, and from the mouth of the false prophet. These are demonic spirits, performing signs, who go abroad to the kings of the whole world, to assemble them for battle on the great day of God the Almighty.” Let’s consider these ‘three frogs’ in regards to Michel de Nostradamus' writings; he made many predictions about the future which have mystified scholars for over four hundred years. He too predicted that Earth would be bathed in three powerful and tyrannical leaders that he calls anti-Christs who would lead ‘their’ people through reigns of terror after first seducing them with promises of greatness. Napoleon is thought to have been the first, Adolf Hitler the second, the third is said to be more hideous than all the others. Of this evil Nostradamus writes, “Out of the country of Greater Arabia, Shall be born a strong master of Mohammed, He will enter Europe wearing a blue turban. He will be the terror of mankind. Never more horror.” Many historians believe that Nostradamus predicted the final war will begin in 1999 and last 27 years. All in all, something is coming down but if Nostradamus was falty about 1999 but correct in 27 years of terror; perhaps taking the ‘end point’ of Earth according to the Mayans as 2012 and subtract 27 year we’ll get a better starting point? This brings us to 1985. Consider this quote from Liber AL vel Legis III: “I am the warrior Lord of the Forties: the Eighties cower before me, & are abased. I will bring you to victory & joy: I will be at your arms in battle & ye shall delight to slay. Success is your proof; courage is your armour; go on, go on, in my strength; & ye shall turn not back for any!” It is no secret that the 1940s were bathed in war thanks to Hitler and since the 1980s our Earth has been equally abased, or 'dragged down' to levels of depravity worldwide. The Mormons also believe that the end is coming soon; they tell all their followers that God told them that we must all have one year’s worth of food supplied and stored in order to ride out the final period. I don’t know if 2012 scares you but what terrifies me, if a years supply is true, is that I estimate I’ll need somewhere between 14,000 to 16,000 cans of beer to ride out Armageddon! And I'm not sharing!

4:35am I awoke to an email from Kathleen in Mt. Shasta. She sent me a lengthy but real nice tome, asking lots of fun and amusing questions; one of which is: “Are you ever going to write your own autobiography? It would be amusing to read. I still don’t know what kind of job you do in the real world, or if you are married or single?” ... I replied, “Yes, I’m single right now but I almost started going out with an unbelievably beautiful Asian girl with long black silky hair over the weekend. Unfortunately she turned out be very psychic and she left me before we had a chance meet.”

3:50am I received a great question recently from one of my students requesting information on the proper way of doing certain rituals. It reminded me of letters that I use to send to Grady. Let me share with you my reply to my student: “He [i.e. Grady] always wanted me to write tomes on the breakdown, symbolism and my understanding of how to do the ritual properly and when I gleefully submitted it like a salivating little child; he often simply said “Good” and then told me to go do it. To be perfectly honest, I thought he was lazy in the beginning. With time he carefully explained that I had to make “each ritual my own.” In other words; there is always a basic structure or foundation consistent in all rituals which simple study by a good student can discover. However, to own something, is to listen to “yes/no” of your Angel’s guidance which will fine tune it to yourself. If ritual magick was so simple that all you had to do is perform it perfectly by some book, of which a lot have been published on the subject, why aren’t there more magicians out there? The answer is simple. Most people who get into magick become good ‘dramatic ritualists’ who can perform roles in OTO initiations, Rites of Eleusis or other such dramas but they fail to understand that to do High Magick requires a student to realize that their Universe (i.e. Star) has different Laws than all others. How does your Universe differ? I can’t tell you, otherwise I’d be pretending to know your True Will. But the best advice I can give you is that ritual unfold Self. You are a scientist, study the ritual in-depth and go with what works for you! Carefully documenting everything. You don’t need anyone else’s approval at something being right or wrong in ritual. Burn into your mind AL III:42! I wish I had a nickel for every time in my early magickal youth where I looked for approval, told friends about my rituals and found myself defending what I had done because some idiot claimed I had performed it wrong by their understanding. Remember, of any ritual, there is no law beyond do what thou wilt! If you are a good scientist and after doing a ritual you feel inside that something was ‘wrong’ ... study your notes, change the ritual accordingly and re-do it! Keep re-doing it until you are comfortable with the ritual and if what you come up with is radically different than someone else’s, who cares? It is not a spectator’s sport. Success is your only proof!

Monday May 7, 2007 – 1:45pm Just today I sent off a few emails about my book on Aleister Crowley and the Ouija Board and of my successes or failures. I thought I might share with my readers one particular story. In November of 2003 I use to give Ouija lessons in my apartment building which is a block off UC Berkeley Campus in Berkeley. The building is filled with young college students, lots of whom are young girls. Anyway on the 23rd of November I noted in my diary, after one of my talks: “They are so ‘wired’ about playing with the board that it’s kinda amusing. I told them that I’ll get my Ouija from storage and we’ll do some experimenting.” Which I did and on the 29th we set a date to do a full ritual in the girl’s apartment, or No. 2-5 on the second floor. My diary entry of this event is as follows: “7:00pm Went down to the girl’s apartment with my Ouija & implements etc & etc. Everybody was there, with lots of wine. We chatted awhile. I set up the circle & other pre-requisites etc & etc. Beside the curtains being drawn, the only light came from a huge candle. Two girls worked the board. Everyone sat on the floor inside the circle. I stood and after doing the preliminaries, Enochian Call etc & the evocation of an elemental of Earth of Earth, I asked the elemental to identify itself but, before the triangle could even move, the big candle on the coffee table simply ‘went out’ and a loud noise like bang came from the bathroom, like someone slamming the toilet seat. Everyone freaked, to say the least. It was funny watching everyone get scared, scream and grab each other. Sadly, even though it proved success, they wanted to go no further. So we closed down the ritual and spent the evening just drinking and chatting. Also, amusingly, both girls decided to stay down the hall with one of them uttering to the other, I can’t stay here!” Anyway, no one was near the candle when it blew out, nor was there any window open to produce a draft. As to why the toilet seat violently fell; it had to be something that the elemental picked up from one of the kid’s minds and was simply trying to fulfill but what? I could only wonder, if really really scared, did someone keep thinking, “I have to pee?” And was the elemental (poltergeist) simply directing them where? The next night I had to go back to the apartment to ‘banish’, if for no other reason than to pacify the young girl. She was still very scared. I should have known this was going to happen? In time, both girls moved out. Then, year’s later two new girls moved in. I noted in my diary on Sept.6th 2006, that I “Ran into Amanda, the pretty young thing who moved into 2-5. Out of the blue she asked if anyone has ever said anything about this building being haunted. I replied no and asked why? We chatted awhile about ‘ghosts’ and it appears that her bedroom may be haunted. She explained that it has a "weird energy” in it like a “presence.” How funny, I couldn’t bring myself to tell her about the Ouija ritual that I had done in there with some of the previous tenants nor what we had summoned! I guess my ‘banishing’ didn’t work but was only a temporary fix to the problem? Or better yet, how sensitive is Amanda? Did she re-open the portal? I gave her a copy of my Ouija book!” ... Later, she knocked at my door and gave me a beautiful flower in thanks for my book. I graciously accepted. Inevitably, like all college students, she moved out. I’m not all that friendly with the new tenant but every now and then when I see her in the hall, I just smile as if concealing an inside joke.

4:35am I received a typical inquiry over the weekend from a student claiming that they don’t believe in God but they want to know if they can still pursue the quest of the Knowledge and Conversation of their Holy Guardian Angel? To which I can only give with my standard answer: “Yes, but don’t blame the system if you fail.” Must I point out that it is totally illogical, if not utterly sacrilegious, to request help from any part of a spiritual hierarchy, including something within your own self [i.e. Higher Self], which must inevitably report to other spiritual beings whom you adamantly reject as even existing. As a Gnostic you must come to terms with this problem that is rooted in your ability to have 'faith' [Pistis] in God; which is the foundation stone of spirituality. Once faith has been achieved, we attain ‘Knowledge’ [Gnosis]. ... The bottom line; without faith, no knowledge, without knowledge, no conversation.

Sunday May 6th 2007 – 9:45am While reviewing my diaries I came across this question in an old emails which has insights in my response which I’d like to share. The answer is as pertinent today as when I wrote it years ago to one of my students and I think some of my newer students can learn from it as well. - Question: “If formulas like ABRAHADABRA and Babalon are important to Thelemic magick, isn’t it fair to say that while they are Old Aeonic formulas, they are also New Aeonic formulas because they have applications relevant to the New Aeon?” I replied, “Most definitely. Some of the greatest errors made by New Aeonic writers is the belief that with the advent of the new all the old must be discarded. The concept that humanity is evolving toward a greater independent spirituality and still requires the knowledge of ABCs is often overlooked simply because most Thelemites do not know ‘how’ we still need these old formulas. We need them for a number of reasons. First, because they reveal the path we’ve already walked. To argue that these formulas are no longer needed because we’ve worked them in our past incarnations, we’ve accomplished the lessons and we must now simply move on, would be pretentious of us. In truth, it’s not that easy. Yes, we may already have assimilated the lessons and we might very well unconsciously know them in the here now but as a magician we must learn to bring them back out into the light of day with a ferocity so that they can follow the course of the Sun; to born, live in our mind and then die in order for a new birth, or knowledge, to occur. This way, instead of being one of the slaves who live out the unconscious thralldom of accumulated incarnations, a magician sees the world in a different light and ‘consciously’ stirs the old ashes of past fires in order for the Phoenix to be reborn. Second, and equally important, you cannot know the new formulas unless to know the old; algebra is useless if fractions are not grasped and to know algebra means that you did not discard adding and subtracting as much as taking it to a new level. Thus, do Old Aeonic formulas have an application in the New Aeon? Most definitely."

7:20am I received an email this morning with the following question: “I just found a parody that you wrote titled Aleister Crowley’s 1947 Diaries in a bookstore here in New York City. I know you write these with half truths/half distortions. The Montauk jokes I got, cause I love Moon’s books. I presume Clamado is Amado but the Gnomon stuff went over my head. It is mentioned a lot, any clues to who you are talking about?” ... Answer: Wow. I’m impressed that you actually found one of my old parody pamphlets; this one is very rare. The Gnomon humor come from Charles Portis’ novel The Masters of Atlantis (1985); the author who gave us the western classic True Grit which was made into a movie staring John Wayne. Anyway, The Masters of Atlantis concerns itself with the establishment of the order of the Gnomons, a secret society purporting to teach the hidden knowledge of Atlantis. It began with Lamar Jimmersan who is an American doughboy in 1917 France; who learns that his life's purpose is to administer the brotherhood of the Gnomons - preservers of the wisdom of the lost city of Atlantis - and Gnomonism rises, obviously fraudulently in America. If you read the book, substitute Gnomon with OTO, it becomes an historical doppelganger [or is that hysterical?]. It was like Portis was writing about the OTO. It was Keith Schurholz who turned me onto this book and to the similarities between the two organizations. If you can find a copy, buy it, it’s a fun read. ... And of your other questions: first no, then no, no, yes and no. Of the “biggie question” I cannot ‘reveal’ or I’ll be expelled from the OTO. Oh, wait a minute; I’m no longer a member. ... However, when you asked: “Is it true that Crowley didn’t die in 1947 or is that part a joke?” Of course he survived, don’t the diaries prove that he faked his death and went with Lam to Mars in a UFO! What’s the problem?

7:10am Today is the birthday of one of my closest and dearest friends; Luis Alvarado. He was born in Bayamon, Puerto Rico. He had met Grady Louis McMurtry; was initiated into the Ordo Templi Orientis at Brocken Mountain Lodge and later Charted to run his own OTO body known as the Harz Camp in Hartford, Connecticut. He moved to California in March of 1994, where he presently resides. He is also an AA initiate; duly recognized and Charter to run a Clerk House in Grady’s lineage titled The Throne of The Double-Wanded One Clerk House. He is the author of the book Psychology, Astrology & Western Magic (1991).

Saturday May 5th 2007 – 3:00pm For those who might be interested: I [meaning J. Edward Cornelius] have published an article titled Anthony Powell, A biographical Sketch of a Friend & Acquaintance of Aleister Crowley. It appears in the ANTHONY POWELL SOCIETY newsletters, Issue No.26, Spring 2007, Middlesaex, England, 6 x 8 ¼ stapled pamphlet, white cover, 32 pgs.

9:15am For the history minded; check out the website of the NEW YORK PRESS: http://www.nypress.com/16/23/news&columns/feature.cfm. It is a reprint of an article titled The Doom that came to Chelsea which has great info on the old New York OTO in its early years by my dear friend Alan ‘The Mad Duck’ Cabal.

8:06am Yesterday, after reading my May 3rd 9:50 entry, the noted psychologist Luis Alvarado M.A, http://www.lalvarado.com/, the author of Psychology, Astrology & Western Magic (1991), sent me a brief email which I’d like to quote in its entirety. - “Do you think that brain is still falling? Metaphorically speaking? It would explain a lot.....” To which I quickly replied, “Are you telling me that the 'splat' was a prelude to it just bouncing and rolling somewhere? If so, it would explain alot!” ... I am reminded of something Aldous Huxley once said: “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad.”

5:25am An historical note worth considering: At a dinner party a woman named Peggy, disliking Aleister Crowley’s beliefs concerning woman, approached him and asked, “You think we're fools & crude primitive animals! What are we then?” To which our Prophet simply replied, “Mind-readers.” ... from Aleister Crowley’s private diary, dated April 19th 1939.

Friday May 4, 2007 – 5:15pm Question: “Have you ever heard of a book by Aleister Crowley called The Dwarf?” Answer: You are probably referring to The Purple Dwarf. This was supposedly an Erotic Novel. In The Magickal Record of the Beast 666 by Aleister Crowley, Edited by John Symonds and Kenneth Grant (Quebec, Canada: Next Step Publications 1972) p.44, under the date of October 6th 1914 there is following entry: "... restless night, full of ideas especially The Dwarf." The footnote to this comment simply states: "No book, essay, short story or poem of this title by Crowley of this period or later is extent." Years later when Gerald Yorke was helping Andrew Drylie with his Crowley-Cross Index (England 1976) he commented - “Purple Dwarf - erotic novel, no copy traced.” Hope this is helpful.

3:35pm Since my heart attack I find myself tired a lot. I just now woke from my afternoon nap, got a cup of coffee and turned on my computer. I found a few emails waiting for me; one from some guy named Mike who writes: “There was a reason you were thrown out of OTO! Read your blog, you break Oaths and your sense of humor is sickning [sic]. If you were a fraction of the spirtual [sic] leader you say I might actually follow you.” ... Ouch. And I didn’t even finish my cup of coffee yet! Anyway, I was not ‘thrown out’, I went in-active. Also, consider this quote by Aleister Crowley - “The Common defect of all mystical systems previous to that of the Aeon whose Law is Thelema is that there was no place for Laughter.” (Little Essays Toward Truth) Now buzz off, let me finish my coffee and by all means, learn to use spell check.

12:25pm I received an interesting question about Liber AL vel Legis I:30. “This is the creation of the world, that the pain of division is as nothing, and the joy of dissolution all.” ... And to answer it; yes, there is a change in the verse referring to “the pain of division.” This is one of those quirks where Crowley crosses out the original word in the manuscript and scribles another word above it. What makes this verse controversial is thatnowhere does Crowley mention why he did this, nor what he scribbled out. To clear up this mystery you must look under a magnifying glass at the word “division” on the manuscript, then look directly below at the crossed out word. You’ll realize both words begin with the letter ‘d’ and both end with the same ‘n’ in Crowley’s handwriting. The second and third letters are clearly ‘i & s’, the rest is open for interpretation. As to the real word, it is mentioned in a letter by Frater Achad dated March 27th 1948. Here he states, “A.C. changed ‘disunion’ to ‘division’, it originally read: pain of disunion, as you can see for yourself.” He is of course correct. If further proof is required as to the real word being ‘disunion’ then note that the word ‘union’ is mentioned only once in Liber AL and luckily it’s in the verse just before this one, or in I:29, which makes it convenient to examine Crowley’s handwriting in relationship to the scribled out word. You’ll immediately notice they’re almost identical, except for what looks like a ‘t’ in the scribbled out word. Ironically that’s atypical Crowley ‘u’ or v’, go figure? ... The bigger question; "How did changing the word to 'division' alter the original context of the verse which had 'disunion' ?"

10:20am "The Misfortune of my life is that there is no background music." JEC's diary entry July 14th 2003. He had just turned 52.

8:10am I received a question, something that I am often asked, that I would like to share: “I’ve been studying Crowley for years but I cannot find anywhere where he tells me in straightforward terms how to discover my True Will?” Answer: It is no secret that Crowley wrote volumes upon volumes trying to define the nature of the True Will but as far laying an adequate, if not simple ‘First Step’ for the masses, he utterly failed. Many charlatan-like leaders in the position of authority in some groups do not want you to know this simple fact; they want to dangling carrots before their students, promising them truths 'down the line’ with further initiations but giving them little more than slavery. In the next issue of CORNELIA [No.8] I go into this problem in-depth in order to explain what a magician must do first. Basically, everyone thinks that they must climb the Tree of Life upward toward the sphere of Tiphereth in order to discover their True Will but, in truth, you need to go backwards. Crowley tells us this very clearly. You need to accomplish an understanding of what the Greeks called the ‘First Gift.’ Then, upon achieving this, you go for the ‘Second Gift’ and together, usually in Tiphereth, these two gifts will enable you to realize that your HGA [daimon] has been guiding you since birth in order to help you fulfill your ‘calling’ which is the reason (True Will) behind your incarnation. This entire process has been carefully laid out step by step in the issues of CORNELIA in the series In Quest of the Holy Guardian Angel.

See - http://cornelius93.com/CorneliaMagazine1.html

Thursday May 3rd 2007 – 12:48pm You asked, "What is the OTO microwave joke that you published in Red Flame No.6 The Foolish Issue? No one here wants to tell me." OK, but I'm not responsible for it. I originally heard it from Frater Hymenaeus Beta.

Question: What knocks twelve times and explodes?

Answer: A Minerval in a microwave!

10:45pm I am occasionally tormented by new students who, as with all new students, inevitably make mistakes where I’m forced to chastise their behavior but who then complain that obviously I don’t love them. Why is it that these students then feel the need to ‘defend’ their actions with lengthy tomes of rambling pits of Because? The bottom line is that I’m not asking my students to love me, nor am I asking them to blindly follow my every word. But, as a lesson to all who want to become magicians, if you want to play the game of magick, it is a harsh road and is this not why we have teachers; hopefully to see behavior that we do not and to steer us clear of the precipice? In that light there is no room to torment the teacher with ‘Becauses” which merely implies that the student is simply continuing on toward the cliff while babbling justification. Remember, a teacher is not out to learn from the student as much as it is the student who needs to learn from the teacher how to readjust their focus off Malkuth into thinking like a magician! As a final note: most of the time the student’s ramblings are correct but usually off kilter and simply missing the point. The student more often than not argues from the point of view of Malkuth.

9:50am While I was reviewing my 1978 diaries I can across an entry that amused me. I use to keep a notepad next to my bed and jot down dreams and thoughts the moment I woke. This entry on September 19th described my dream: “While leaning over the cliff, as far in my mind as I dare go, my skull opened up and my brain fell out. I watched it descend into the darkness and time seemed to slow. It was then that I heard a splat.” I added into my diary that I woke thinking to myself, “I’m not going to have a good day today.”

8:25am I received an email from a close friend last night which I thought I might share since its problem is rooted in all our actions, myself included. He wrote to me saying, “I enjoy your company and you often give me much to consider. I only got the first 4 Cornelias, but your teachings on the H.G.A. really inspired and propelled me for a bit there to take up my magical path once again. However, I find the original momentum lost in the subtle psychological complexes and excuses that have been challenging me my whole life. Once again I feel that ‘dryness’ Crowley referenced and which I have clearly understood along the way, at least a various points. I find myself lost in myself. I read Cornelia and eventually I find myself, after a number of synchronicities, taking an oath to pursue the great work aka AA at the foot of the Statue of Liberty after reading Liber OZ. I return home and find ‘dryness.’” ... He is not alone, the path up the Sacred Mountain is a barren walk with little or no scenery. It is easy to focus all our attention outward into reality where a mind often feels safe. It is equally easy to become consumed by our daily lives in order to exist. We need clothes, food and relationship. We need things of a Malkuthian nature. But, if the ‘passion’ is great, we feel a ‘dryness’ or better put, ‘emptiness’ as if something inside is whispering to remind us to turn around and look within and we feel guilty, or without direction. At this point the average person simply goes to Church on Sunday; they feel ‘saved’ and then they go back to the daily lives. For a magician it is not so easy. He has one foot on the mountain. He has “tasted the dust on the road” and this dryness is forever in his mouth. Solution? As Grady once told us during a lecture on the Banishing Ritual at my OTO Lodge in Connecticut back in August of 1978, after I had mentioned how some days I felt internally absent with no direction, he said “banish often!” He proceeded to explain that he didn’t want me to do the lengthy new banishing (Lies XXV) but the banishing ritual from Liber AL vel Legis. On this note; I will tell you, as Grady told me, read Chapter XIV of Magick, the two footnotes which begin “The Hebrew legends ... “ and the very next one starting with “These may now ...” With this you’ll realize that consecration is by water and banishing by fire; now read AL I:50 ‘The gross must past through fire.” - Banish often!!! - If you have read the footnotes you’ll realize that the banishing ritual in Liber AL vel Legis is to inflaming yourself and simply recite: “For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect.” (AL I:44) And then get on with your life! ... Now read Crowley’s Commentary The Law is For All to this verse, as well as The Book of Lies 44. ... Finally, we don’t need a lengthy solution to combating what we feel to be emptiness, or lose of direction. We need to just smile, dig our feet in, recite passionately I:44 and realize that upon Malkuth every act is a magickal act, we are never lost. I have not inspired you “to take up my magical path once again”, you have never stopped walking upon it. Remember, some people crawl, some walk, others run but the most important just lighten up, enjoy the stroll inward and outward in the incarnation you’ve chosen and stop beating yourself up. But, as I still do to this day, banish often!!! – “Lust of result seems like a barren wasteland in my mouth.” (JEC’s diary August 3, 1978)

Wednesday May 2, 2007 – 2:45pm I just went to my Post Office Box and found the latest issue of BEHUTET, Modern Thelemic Magick & Culture No.33 Spring 2007 (Thelesis Oasis, OTO, Philadelphia, PA) waiting for me. It has a great full length article with photos by Clive Harper titled The Equinox Bookshop: Some Images and Impressions. This bookstore in London, once owned by none other than Jimmy Page, truly has a remarkable legacy. The article was a fun read. Thanks Clive for sharing these memories with us!

1:10pm In response to my earlier entry of 11:20, Bob writes, "That's why we here in New York call them OTO Initiasses." Ouch!

12:21pm We just had an earthquake here in Berkeley! Shook my little apartment rather good while I was typing ... but it was only a 3.0. It knocked one of my paintings off the wall and slopped my coffee out of the cup!

11:20am The OTO is a funny little organization; it makes me laugh. It admits that it has mutated and no longer teaches ‘certain’ Mysteries regarding ON because they are “related to Grady McMurtry's teachings” but, then again, its initiates send me irate emails informing me that I should stop teaching what they no longer instruct simply because "I’m still revealing ‘secrets’ regardless if they are no longer being taught." Am I missing something?

5:06am To the individual who wrote me the email this morning claiming to “know the OTO secrets” but who doesn’t think “magic, meditations or Yoga” or "similar practices are necessary to perform it properly", as I claim. OK, believe as ye will. You also asked, "Let's debate theory." Sorry, NO. ... but I will tell you this:

"... Ninth Degree work is relatively useless save in the hands of someone

who has acquired the basic disciplines of both Yoga and Magic, as did the

Old Man [i.e. Crowley. Most modern students, as I know them, know very

little Yoga and next to nothing about Magic - and then wonder why the Ninth

Degree fails of effect"

Letter from Israel Regardie to Grady McMurtry

September 19th, 1974

4:45am For the history buffs: On this date in 1601 Athanasius Kircher was born in Geisa, Abbacy of Fulda, or Thuringia, Germany. He was sometimes called the last Renaissance man, important for his prodigious activity in disseminating knowledge. He joined the Society of Jesus in 1616. He first read mathematics and philosophy at Würzburg, then moved to Avignon and lastly to Rome, where he was appointed teacher of mathematics at the Collegio Romano c. 1638. A prolific writer of European fame, Kircher authored works on subjects ranging from philology to physics, sacred writings, astronomy, natural history, mathematics, music, Egyptology, geography, and Chinese civilization. His greatest legacy has to do with one of the most well-known symbols in the Qabalah known as Otz Chim, or the Tree of Life. This Tree of Life symbol represents everything about our Universe, both above and below, both externally and internally. This glyph supposedly teaches us the hidden secrets of creation itself. It is important to recognize the fact that the Tree of Life has been evolving over the centuries. Its fundamental shape has undergone many mutations as well as numerous additions. Although there are many archaic drawings portraying the Ten Divine Spheres of God, called the sephiroth, most have a totally different quantity and configuration of paths that unite these spheres. Even the shape of the Tree itself varies. Many people mistakenly think that image of the Tree of Life used amongst today’s magicians and found in most Qabalistic books is of an ancient Jewish glyph - it is not. Although the Tree’s theoretical origins are webbed deep in Judaic lore, its design was actually conceived in the mind of Athanasius Kircher. While attending the Jesuit College in Rome he devoted most of his life to collecting information from many different religions, observing the Universe, analyzing, synthesizing, and publishing what he learned. His books are filled with a multitude of beautiful illustrations. In one such book titled Oedipus Aegyptiacus (1652) he drew a glyph of the “Sephirothic System” on a Tree of Life as he has ascertained it to be. His drawing clearly shows three pillars comprising of ten spheres, which he connected by twenty-two paths of his own devising while attributing these paths to the Hebrew letters. Hebrew Qabalists so embraced Kircher’s design as being an accurate portrayal of God’s Will that over a period of time it has become acceptable Judaic lore. However, most historians agree, it is Kircher’s design, from the mind of a Christian, which is the earliest rendition of the Tree of Life which most readily used today. Kircher died on November 27, 1680 in Rome.

Tuesday May 1st 2007 – 11:30pm Mary from Long Island asks, “What do you mean by ‘sign?” Answer: Signs are diverse and hard to clarify because everyone’s Angel communicates in a different fashion. Basically they are subtle whispers given to you from your Angel which make you ‘realize’ that something which has been offered, or has occurred, is not to your best interest but has only been given to benefit the here-now and, indirectly, to hinder your ascent up the Tree. You are receiving ‘signs’ constantly, most people ignore them or consider them little more than their ‘conscious’ muttering "yes" or "no" (Socrates) but the more you become aware of how the Angel & Demon both ply their trade the far better off you’ll become. You only have so many years walking on this Earth and realizing what keeps you from focusing to aspire toward your True Will is mandatory.

10:45pm I thought I might share some insights with my readers because they are important lessons for all of us to learn; regardless of which magickal degree that you hold on the Tree of Life. Never forget; Nature will always try to right the wrong and keep you on, or try to return you to Malkuth (Earth) or ‘this plane.’ Mankind has no place climbing up into the branches, or so the Gods tell us. You must pay attention to the signs or you’ll fall out of the Tree. All magicians, starting right with the Neophyte, will forever be tempted by their personal demon, or Kundrie. If you are so shallow as to think that such a temptresses will only use ‘sex’ as the weapon to stop your ascent then you are a foolish little rabbit. They have an arsenal. Besides, where does it say that your demon cannot use ‘anything’ to tempt you? Remember; the demon rules the Square; he gives where you’re weakest. The square in your magickal degree must be put under control otherwise the demon, i.e. the Kundrie, will tempt you in relationship to the kind of energy where you presently reside in order to pull you back down to Malkuth. Your Angel is pulling from Above, the Demon from Below. Being a magician is not a part-time occupation; if you cannot take heed of the signs, starting on Malkuth, then you should never consider going higher.

8:20am Question, “Could you please give me a hint as to what that little circle and square insinuates in a magical degree of a Neophyte?” Answer: This ‘circle’ and ‘square’ is rarely understood, much less even discussed. This is a travesty because it details the approach a magician must take in relationship to the Qabalistic sphere on the Tree of Life in which he or she resides. In the most simplistic sense the ‘square’ always represent the ‘sphere’ and, in the case of a Neophyte, it tells us that the magician is upon the 10th sphere of Malkuth. The symbol of the square will always represent the four-fold “secret forces of Nature” of the particular ‘sphere’ as it manifests in relationship to our human body. As a Neophyte the circle after the 1 refers to Kether on the macrocosmic Tree of Life or the ‘great world’ which symbolizes the Universe itself. The macrocosm, or circle, is often equated with the six-sided Hexagram. The microcosm, or square, is equated with that of the five-sided Pentagram. Both being Nuit and Hadit. The unity of these two symbols, called the “squaring of the circle,” can also be written as 6 + 5 = 11; eleven being the sacred number of magick referring to the Great Work. Alchemically this implies the principle of Solve et Coagula, the dissolution of the Self into the infinity, the uniting of the above with the below until naught remains. This is but a fraction of the mysteries behind the initiatory glyph of a circle squared but to end this thought I will say that no matter which magickal degree you hold, “You must master and learn to control the forces of the Square” while placing your “Spirit within the care of the Circle.” In other words, one you must learn to control, while the other controls.

CLICK HERE TO GO DIRECTLY

TO THE NEXT DATES STORED IN THE ARCHIVE

"There were plants, And birds, And rocks And things”

--America's Horse With No Name

Love is the law, love under will. – AL I:57

Return to BLOG Main Page